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Getting the help you need
People tend to wait too long to arrange for support in the care of a loved one with dementia. For many families, support services are sought at the point where the primary care giver has reached the end of their abilities to cope with the mental stress or physical demands, or at the point at which the primary care giver’s own health is at jeopardy.
The energy it takes to care for someone with dementia creates both a physical and emotional drain; the care giver must be diligent in monitoring the needs of someone with memory loss, and the job can quickly take a heavy toll. The underlying stress of not knowing what to expect and not knowing what may happen next erodes the care giver’s ability to cope with the multiple, physical demands of care giving.
Many people find it difficult to ask someone outside their immediate family to assist in providing the necessary care. By transferring some of the care responsibilities to professional care givers, the family finds that this is exactly what they need in order to be of continued emotional support to their loved one.
There comes a point where one person may not be able to provide all the care needed by someone with Alzheimer’s disease. It may take an additional person, or even a group of people to meet the personal care needs of your loved one.
Learning to place your trust in other people takes time; learning to place your loved one in the trust of care givers also takes time. No two care givers will extend care in exactly the same way; being open to allowing care to be provided in a different but appropriate way will let you become comfortable with the new situation as well as helping the person with dementia make a smooth transition.
Once the transition occurs, it is common for family members to have feelings of guilt. These feelings are a natural progression from being fully responsible to being only partially responsible. The beneficial trade off is that it becomes possible to meet the person’s physical and emotional needs by sharing the responsibilities.
Being committed to this change is essential in helping this transition to occur for all concerned. It won’t be a perfect situation, but it is a situation which is necessary to bring enough balance back into life to allow people to function.
The very best providers don’t always have availability, so planning ahead and knowing of several options is the best way to plan for the future. Arranging for care while the person with memory loss is still able to integrate into their new lifestyle and routines is helpful. Taking a proactive approach to arranging for care is wise. If you’re caring for someone with dementia, chances are you need support. At the very least, you need a scheduled and specific break to care for your own, personal and emotional needs.
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Last update: 2007-04-23 23:59
Author: Tech Support
Revision: 1.0
