Assisted Living Frequently Asked Questions » Getting started
I have four places that are at the top of my list to show my parents. They are coming in from out of state to visit and to look at places to live. They will likely move here next year. Should I show them all four, and should I mail them packages of information on each community? How much of my own opinion should I give them?
Four communities is a lot, yet two communities is not enough. Three options is an ideal number to consider.
To review your options, contact a Referral Agent who can offer a broader scope options, so that you know you are truly offering your parents the top three picks. You'll likely want to go and pre-view the communities at the top of your list. I wouldn't list the communities in order of your preference, because your parents will appreciate making their decision on their own. You may consider letting them know that you've worked with a professional to define their options and that you have made appointments to view the "three best matches" for them.
If they ask you to choose for them, or if they ask for your input, feel free to give it to them; but keep in mind that your tastes and your parent's tastes may be very different. Over the years, I've found that adult children will most often prefer a community that their parents would consider their 2nd or 3rd preference.
Remember, your parents have to live there 24-hours a day, 7-days a week; whereas you may only occassionally visit or spend shorter periods of time in the building. Giving your parents the room to make decisions on their own will help them feel more independent when making this move. And, by staying out of their way in making a decision, you help make the process a bit easier for them by supporting their decision.
For assistance with arranging for in-home care or for help choosing a senior housing or care community call CHOICE at 800-361-0138.
Last update: 2007-03-23 15:25
Author: Support
Revision: 1.1
